A+ relationship: Playing video games together, rough sex, pizza and awful humor that only you two can laugh at.
Human: “HAHAHA Animals are so dumb!”
*goes to war with its own species, uses up all of its resources, destroys its own environment, pollutes its own air and water*
Animal: *licks its own asshole*
human: *licks someone else’s asshole and calls it sex*
this is mY FAVORITE THING
I’ve decided I want to be cremated. Not when I die, just whenever. Surprise me.